Lumbar puncture ( spinal tap)
post tussive emisis ( coughing until you throw up)- quick, protect the laptop!
letting the dog on the bed before checking him for ticks ( will I create some kind of super Lyme/flu?)
Having the kind of neighbor who takes your bored, hyper dog for the day, leave cold seltzer and hot coffee on the porch, and acts like this is all no big deal
sending the kids and husband to the sister in laws